More Fogiving Than Jesus Part 2

There is something frightening and yet so beautiful about God using humans to do His advertising for Him. God has called of us as Christ Followers to proclaim His freedom, grace, and love. The gentleman I had the run in with in the store really is a good example of what many of use would like to say on many occasions, we just have the sense to keep our mouths shut, most of the time.


There are way too many of us, who if given the chance would blow an O-ring over something as little as a few dollars and our principles. Where has our joy gone? Where is our first love? Our first love never went any where. We simply stopped paying attention to Him. At first we miss a day of our devotions and then we go a day without praying before our meals, and pretty soon we have stopped talking to God altogether.

You see, just like in a relationship with your spouse or friends. If you’re not communicating something is wrong.

We have to get back to a place of communication with God and as we move toward Him, He will move toward us. The more we want of Him the more He is willing to give, but we have to move. We have to accept what He is offering to us.

If we are willing to offer all of us, He is willing to give all of Him

More forgiving than Jesus

A few weeks ago now I was at work taking care of business when I was called to the store front register to complete a return. Standing there was a gentleman who wanted to return three items, two small $1.99 books and a pin of some sort. He had purchased them for his small group at church.


Our store (Gift and Bible) has a return policy of 30 days with a receipt. Well, this man had his receipt but it was more than double to 30 days. I politely told the man that I was sorry, but I could not give him any cash back however, I would be willing to exchange these product for something else.

What the man said next really took me off guard and by total surprise. He said, “well, I hope Jesus Christ is more forgiving than you are!” and walked out of the store without the products he had brought in.

At first I could not believe what I had just heard. First of all why is this guy allowed to be a small group leader at church, and second, where does he get off making a statement like that. In my mind I was ready to rip this guy a new one, but on the out side I stayed in control and let the man walk out of the store unharmed.

The sad thing is as I continued to think about this encounter I realized that this is the way so many Christians live their lives. Walking around as if their “their shit don’t stink”. I know I am guilty of it. I find myself often times thinking that I am better than someone else because I am a Christian and they aren’t. This thought is a bunch of piled up, stinky, smelly, crap. The only thing we have that they don’t have is a rescuer and the really sad part about is that God has left us in-charge to introduce the lost to the “rescuer”, Jesus.

More than Life

Today is one of those days when you just wish you could stay in bed and sleep the day and all its problems away. Unfortunately this is not going to happen for me today. I have a long shift to work today and my wife is taking my son to get fitted for a helmet. It’s kind of a bitter sweet thing because I do not want to see my son ware a helmet for 2 months, but at the same time I don’t want him to become a teenager and turn to me and say, “Why didn’t you ever fix my head?”


Marcus’s head is some what misshaped. He spends most of his time laying on one side of his head so that side is somewhat flat while the other side has pushed out due to his massive intellect (I guess I am a little partial). Our insurance does not cover the helmet because it is considered cosmetic, but in the long run Marcus is worth so much more than $1800.

It’s hard to believe the God thinks we are worth more than life.

Seek and Find, But What?

Hang on to your hats ladies and gents it’s a hot one in Michigan today. It’s something like 85 degrees out side and then on top of that it is really humid. It’s a roaster, that’s for sure.


I have tried over the last few weeks to write something worth reading, but every time I get to the end of a thought it seems disconnected and shallow, so I let it go and try again some other day. However, I think today might be different. I’m not sure why, maybe it’s the heat getting to me or the fact that Marcus is spitting all over the place, or maybe God wants me to share something deep and profound.

I have been reading a book called Dug Down Deep by Joshua Harris and over the last few chapters he has been talking about grace. I have always held the belief that we accept Jesus into our hearts and confess that He is Lord and we will be saved (Romans 10:9). I am continually blown away by this verse and the verses that follow it. These may be some the easiest verse in the whole bible to understand, but they are also some of the most powerful if not the most powerful. The powerful work of salvation is an amazing thing to watch. I have people who look tired and old and run down accept Jesus and I see them a week later and they look like a totally different person. They look younger, have a better attitude and they have life.

I love salvation, but sanctification is another story. Sanctification is most often times painful and ugly. I firmly believe that sanctification comes through going through trials and hardships (James 1:2-4). James tells us to count this process pure joy because at the end of it we will be lacking nothing, but how am I supposed to be joyful when ______ (fill in your own trial) is happening to me. This is a question I’m not sure I can answer at this time; I guess this is why we study God’s word to learn and grow in knowledge of Him. The only answer I can give is the pat Christian answer that says that the Holy Spirit will give you joy no matter what, but I am not into pat Christian answer such as these.

I want to know why I know something and why I believe it. Not just because some other Christian says it’s the right answer. God tells us to seek Him. I want to seek Him and find Him and hopefully when I find Him He will find me faithful. There are many questions that the bible raises. In fact it raises more questions than answers, but I know that as long as I seek Him, I will find Him.

The more abundant life

Yesterday at church during our Easter celebration, I felt God's prompting to sponsor a child from the Dominican Republic. I felt it would be such an easy way to thank God for his provision in my own life. A woman in our church started a ministry called "Hands of Grace" that sponsors children, provides medical/local needs, church planting, and microfinance loans to the Dominican Republic. A $35 a month sponsorship provides for a one child, quality education, food, Christian discipleship, medical care, and a chance for their family to break the cycle of poverty. After the service, I found her and leafed through photo after photo of children with bright eyes and big smiles. My heart gave a tug as I came to the packet of a little 3 year old boy named Luis Gabriel. His big eyes, face shape, and even his smile reminded me of my son Marcus. His profile said he loves to play, draw and paint, and LOVES baseball. He said he doesn't have a favorite food because he likes everything and loves the color blue. As I read these things, I felt a connection to him, since my husband and I like the same things!

This morning, I pulled out his packet again and read a little bit further on his profile. "Please pray for my family. Please pray for me as I continue to learn lots of new things every day. Pray for me a lot as I am in remission from Leukemia. Pray that I will continue to get stronger and stronger. Thank God that he healed me."

Wow. The thought of providing essentials for my own son on megar wages, and then facing the daunting task of providing appropriate healthcare for him to continue to live just shook me out of my own comforable world. What if being able to provide these things cost time with your child? And if you didn't, it could cost you the life of your child?

So often I get these ugly blinders on my heart. I spend so much time worring about providing non-essentials for my own son, and I don't have to think twice about his next meal, his education, or healthcare. I can spend $35 on a meal out with my husband when we have a stocked fridge and pantry at home. We live an abundant and blessed life. But what if living more abundantly meant sacrificing these non-essentials? Would I really miss out on something special? What if true blessings meant seeing a child celebrate his 4th birthday, and then his 5th birthday, and his 6th birthday, and 7th...

Enriching the lives of another family just deepened the joy of my own family.

If you are interested in sponsoring a child, please visit http://www.hgworldwide.org/

Something is a Woft

Tonight my wife and I were cleaning out the room we call our music room. It houses all of my instruments such as drums, bass, two acoustice guitars, and electric guitar. We found a box that my parents had found at there house a few years after I moved out. In the box I found a journal with my name on it along with a bunch of other drawings and chicken scratch. This is the exerpt from my journal...


4-24-1996
Dear Journal,

Today after my school work was done I went back to where the horses were (we had horse behind our house). I brushed them and fed them even though they are not my horses. I like them, they are nice to pet and they listen to you when no one else will. Then tonight just before I went to bed Joel (my brother) came into my room and farted right on my pillow. It was the most awful smell I have ever smelled in my life. Then he did it again. So I got Rachel's (my sister) body spray and sprayed it in my room. It smelled up the entire house. Rachel went down stairs and told my dad that I sprayed the spray. So Joel and I got in trouble. Then we had to air out the upstairs. I must go now.

Yours, Aaron

P.s. I can still smell the stench!

Breaking Free

So it is official, I am a daddy. I never thought that I would actually like the name “daddy” but it sticks pretty well. The birth of Marcus was amazing and frightening at the same time. Amazing because the sight of a new life coming into the world is amazing, but frightening because for the first I realized as I held this little life in my hands that I have to take care of this new being. There is no turning back, no opting out, all there is to now is go forward.




Like so many fathers before me I desperately want to be a great father, but the odds seem so stacked against this notion. There are so many things that are fighting for the attention of men these days. Work, education, church, TV., hanging out with friends, it all competes for time and affections. What about what truly matters?



Take heart men, we are the warriors of our families. We are the one that MUST stand firm in the fry. We need to step into the battle with our swords held high and our guns blazing for we must fight for our families hearts. God put us in charge of this group of people we know as our families. We are the warriors.



However, Men we need to WAKE UP! To often our wives pick up our battle gear and race onto the field for us simply because we would rather sit in our proverbial easy chairs and watch the world flash by on the TV screen. We have to be the leaders of our families not the ones sitting on the sidelines.



God created us will a flame in our hearts for adventure, and bravery, but we have traded in that adventure for someone else's adventure. I can tell you that I have found myself more than once acting as if I am the bravest hunter in the world, or the avid camper that withstand anything, but the truth is I am a shell of a man when it comes to those things. I like to hunt and camp, but I'm not an expert, I am still not crazy about gutting a deer.



I talk other men as if I know what they are talking about as they talk about cars and shooting a ten point buck when in reality I could care less if a guy just drove by in a souped up 57 Chevy.



I want you to know that what I am writing is more to me than any other person who might happen to read this. I need this little speech I am giving more than most of the men I know.



So how can we as men get past this outer shell and let people see who we really are? We have to be honest with ourselves and realize that we can be who we are, we don't need to be someone else. I have been trying to be someone else my whole life and it just isn't worth it. I tend to find someone I look up to and try to do things the way I think they would do it. This only thickens the sell of who I am.



Stand with me and together we can crack the shell that is keeping us from the life that God wants for us.

Fear and Facebook

For the last few months I have been dealing with this fear that seems to come over me whenever I see someone get in trouble at work. For some reason I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that they got in trouble because of me. I know it sounds absurd, but this is the feeling I get every time.

I was reading in the Psalms this morning and came across a psalm that really spoke to my heart today. I love how God uses the bible to speak directly to things that we are going through in our lives. It is Psalm 27: 1-3.

“The Lord is my light and my

Salvation -

whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the stronghold of my

life -

of whom shall I be afraid?

When evil men advance against me

to devour my flesh,

when my enemies and my foes attack

me,

they will stumble and fall.

Though an army besiege me,

my heart will not fear;

though war break out against me,

even then will I be confident.”

(Psalm 27:1-3 NIV)

This week was a fairly trying week for me. Someone I work with was found to be using facebook at work in the owners office no less. Needless to say the owner came unglued. This young woman however was able to keep her job. The owner came and talked to me about this long before she confronted the situation with this young woman. When the owner started talking to me about it I got this feeling in my stomach like it was my fault and fear started to well up inside of me.

I knew that this was a lie from the evil one to bring my attitude down, and I resisted this feeling. I continually told myself that I had done nothing wrong and that it was not my fault. I found myself feeling bad for the young woman because I knew she could lose her job, but again I told myself that this was not my fault and that the young woman had made this choice on her own.

When this young woman was confronted about the use of facebook at work she immediately brought my name into the whole mess by saying that I use my cell phone to text at work which I do to communicate with my wife who is eight months pregnant.

All day yesterday I was feeling as though I was thrown under the bus for something that some else had done and until this morning I was feeling very down about the whole situation. However, God has seemed to step in and say that “you have done nothing wrong” and that He will protect me from the people who try to drag my name through the mud.

I simply need to remember that God is watching over me and through all of life He will protect me from my enemies and therefore I have no need to fear.

Where's My Advice?

This has been on my heart for some time, however because of my chaotic life I have been unable to put it down on screen till now In light of the little bundle of joy that my wife has been carrying for the past six months I wanted to share what I have been going through as a soon to be father. It seems like everywhere we go a group of women encircle Renee and ask the infamous question of “when are you due?” or “do you know what you are having?”. Then you get those well intentioned ladies who give advice about what to expect and how you can tell if it is a boy or girl.

I've never been surrounded by a group of men fawning over me and giving advice about fatherhood and what to expect. Instead I get a bunch of men saying things like “Well you know what you can kiss goodbye.” or “Way to get-ur-done!”. What is a man really suppose to go through while he is waiting in the wings for fatherhood to slap him in the face?

What I have been experiencing may be very different than most men go through, or maybe not, the men aren't talking. Here is what I have been experiencing for the last six months from a birds eye view.

When I heard that Renee was expecting I was excited, but I didn't jump up and down like I did the first time we found out we were pregnant. I was more skeptical this time because of our emotional loss of our first child when Renee was four weeks along. I didn't find it hard to contain my joy simply because we were figuratively holding our breathe.

When we reached the end of the first trimester the excitement still was not there for me, but Renee was so excited that she couldn't wait to tell our families the good news. I on the other hand kind of kept my silence about the hold thing. I was struggling inside whether this child was a good thing or not.

I started thinking about all of the things that I might miss because I would have to look after this new little baby. My mind started to spin out of control with thoughts like “am I ready?, can I provide for my family?, what if I fail as a father and my child turns out like those other bratty kids I see on a daily basis in my store?”.

I continued to entertain thoughts of fear, but nothing bugged me more than the thought of what if I have to give up the things I love because of this kid? As this piece of selfishness weighed on my mind I began to realize that there is nothing that would cause me to through this kid back like a fish. I began to grab hold of the fact that this baby was coming whether I wanted it to or not. I am going to be a father. As my minds eye picked up my jaw off the floor I brushed myself off and stood taller than I did the day before. I came to the realization that I have the chance to raise up a child not for my own, but for the benefit of the rest of the world.

This child could grow up to be the next Billy Graham, or better yet the next Christian rock star (ok, the last one was just for fun, but really). The baby in my wife's womb could be the next great thing and I won't trade the opportunity to be apart of it's beautiful life.

I wrote a short song about what I was feeling and the chorus says it all for me.

“And I can't wait to see your face. And I can't wait to hold your hand. I can't wait to be your daddy.”

Incomprehensible Grace

I love that feeling that a person gets when one is in love. Lately I have been getting that feeling when I think about God. Not that I am able to measure God's love, but simply that I can feel His love around me. But, what happens when a person stops feeling that love and turns to other things to fill that “love spot” in their hearts. For me it was turning to lust to fill the hole.

I know I have shared my story hear before, but I will refresh your memory...

I was abused at a very pivotal time in my life. This time is known as puberty. I have to say that it really messed me up in the head for a long time. Thoughts of suicide ran through my mind on what seemed like a never ending basis.

It has taken years to clean the hurt and pain out of my life from this time in my life, but with the help of friends and my wife I am on the road to healing.

The great news is that God's love is so deep, so wide, so huge, and incomprehensible, that He gave His perfect, one and only Son to murder by you and I so that we could be completely free from the sin that is in our lives. We are so blessed by the grace of God and yet so undeserving.